Spring break is an oasis of booze, beach babes, and parties, and after months of studying and hitting the books hard, that mid-March hiatus from the real world is the sweetest release. But before you pack your bags for Cancun, Panama City Beach, or Las Vegas, check out these crazy spring break stories. You’ll probably find them pretty hilarious, but only because they haven’t happened to you…yet. (Be careful out there!)
“My friends thought it would be a good idea to sneak joints across the Texas state border. I warned them it was stupid, but they didn’t listen. Sure enough, they were stopped by the cops and ended up spending the night in jail—orange jumpsuits and all. It went on their records and my spring break was ruined, all because of a plan I wanted nothing to do with in the first place. I’ve never wanted to say ‘I told you so’ more.”—Graham, 22
The Lesson: Don’t smuggle drugs. Period.
“After a night of drinking in Cancun, I hooked up with a girl I barely knew in a public pool. It was great! But apparently a lot of other people thought so too, because when we were done, onlookers started cheering—including a hotel employee shouting, ‘Yeah!’ in a thick Spanish accent. To make matters worse, I later found out that the girl is actually my distant cousin. I guess we were both so drunk that we didn’t even notice the people watching—or realize that we were related.”—Trevor, 23
The Lesson: Casual hookups can be complicated.
“While I was on spring break in Hawaii, I took a friend out for his 21st birthday. I slammed three drinks in record time and that’s the last thing I remember. I woke up to nothing but the sky above me. Dazed and confused, I looked around and discovered that I was six stories high on the roof of a building, and about a mile or two from the bar we were at the night before. Halfway home I realized I only had one shoe on and was covered with those prickly things that stick to you after crawling though the bushes. The events of that night will forever be a mystery to me.”—Blaine, 23
The Lesson: Know your limits.
“When I was 22, my friend and I went to Florida for spring break. We didn’t have much money to begin with since we spent it all on beer, so the first few nights of our trip were spent bumming hotel rooms from strangers we met at parties. Our last night, however, we ran out of luck. With nowhere to stay and no money for a hotel room, we were forced to sleep in my car in a covered parking garage. The next morning, we bought peanut butter, bread, and just enough gas to coast to the Illinois border on fumes.”—Larry, 48
The Lesson: Budget for more than booze.
“I went to South Padre Island for spring break with my best friend, his roommate, and his roommate’s girlfriend. Little did we know, the roommate and his girlfriend had started a series of fights just before we arrived. Every single night, they would come back to the room screaming at each other. She would be hysterically crying and he would be at her heels, screaming at her and cussing her out. The whole situation was incredibly awkward for everyone involved.”—Ian, 22
The Lesson: Consider a bros-only house policy.
“When I was 25, I went to Acapulco for spring break. The beachfront hotel I stayed in had two hot tubs, which I enjoyed on a regular basis. Within three weeks of returning home, however, I became extremely ill. Turns out I had contracted a serious infection from the hot tubs, which carry millions of bacteria.”—Hugo, 32
The Lesson: Research the hotel before you book.